Giving and receiving feedback: Can it be psychologically safe?

We’ve all been there. Holding back a suggestion in a meeting because we’re not sure how it will land or bracing ourselves when someone says, “Can I give you some feedback?”. In these moments, psychological safety matters.

When we operate in psychologically safe teams, we are more authentic, open and willing to help others. We demonstrate increased creativity, innovation and perform at a high level. We’re also more likely to speak up about concerns, share knowledge rather than hide it, and identify potential issues before they become problems.

A core principle of psychological safety is that it isn’t always easy or fun. It involves giving and receiving constructive feedback, calling things out when you see them, and saying things that can be unpopular. When we give feedback, we risk damaging relationships. When we receive it, we risk having our competence questioned. This is why so many workplace feedback conversations either don’t happen at all or happen poorly.

Who is responsible?

Usually, the onus for feedback-giving falls on people leaders who are responsible for managing work output and quality. There’s a lot of evidence that leaders’ behaviour around feedback sets the tone for the whole team, with listening, transparency and openness creating psychological safety from the top down. When managers share with their teams  the feedback that they have personally received, this helps to normalise and show vulnerability. Such openness has been found to have a lasting, positive impact on psychological safety, while simply asking for feedback did not.

But a strong feedback culture involves everyone, not just leaders. All of us give feedback all the time, even if informally. By respecting others, seeking feedback, sharing information, asking for help and voicing concerns about potential problems, we help to create a team culture where feedback is embraced, not avoided.

Feedback that builds trust

When done well, feedback can be one of the most valuable tools a leader has. It’s not about criticism, but rather to help people grow, learn and succeed. It can strengthen relationships, build trust, spark fresh ideas and keep everyone focused on what matters most.

The core principles behind good feedback practice are to focus on collaboration, curiosity, relationships and reducing shame, by concentrating on dialogue, not criticism. Some simple practices that make a difference include:

• Be clear. Let the other person know why the conversation is happening and keep your tone constructive and respectful.
• Be curious. Ask open questions and listen closely before sharing your perspective. This shows respect and helps you understand the full picture.
• Focus forward. Keep the emphasis on solutions and possibilities, rather than dwelling on what went wrong.
• Work together. Agree on next steps that feel realistic and achievable for both sides.

Three simple steps to start today

Need a helping hand with where to start? Building a feedback culture doesn’t happen overnight, but you can start on some small steps today:

1. Assess your current state. How comfortable do people feel giving and receiving feedback in your organisation? What barriers exist? Consider having some informal conversations to understand your starting point.
2. Start with yourself. Model the behaviour you want to see. Ask for feedback on your own performance and on the quality of feedback you provide. Respond positively when people give you constructive input as this helps to show your team that feedback is something to be valued, not feared.
3. Have meta-feedback conversations. If you are leading a team, ask your team members about their feedback preferences and experiences. What does good feedback look like to them? When has feedback been particularly helpful or particularly deflating? Use these insights to tailor your approach to each individual if possible.